I've been thinking about London and next semester a lot lately ... it's starting to get a little scary now. I guess when I found out I got in I went from one extreme to another ... at first I was completely shying away from it, and I even toyed with the idea of not telling anyone that they had accepted me, and then rejecting it and going on with life as normal. And I came to my senses-- I went to the Grotto and I prayed about it and I talked to my parents and I talked to Dave ... the pathetic thing is that the real reason I let myself be happy with/okay with/excited about going is because of the reaction of the latter. Which was, you know, the right thing to do, and I'm really glad that he reacted the way he did, but ... while I'm really looking forward to it, I'm also dreading it.
The thing is, what am I going to DO? It'll be like the summer except completely different because ... well, because it's NOT the summer. I'm gonna miss a bunch of important milestone-y things, like his birthday and our 2 years. Not to mention the fact that I'm going to miss him terribly (duh). It's not that I'm getting cold feet about going, I just ... I guess I don't know how I'm going to deal with it. You know? I really want to enjoy it, and have the best possible time that I can, but in order to do that I CAN'T be miserable like I was over the summer. That's just not an option. (Worst summer ever, btw-- but that's besides the point, so, yeah.)
I dunno. 2008 is shaping up to be a pretty frickin' awesome year, so maybe that bodes well for the second half as well? I hope so.
In other news, I am so excited for the summer ... I don't think I've been this excited for any summer my whole entire life. I get to be home again (FINALLY), see my family, actually see my friends because we'll all be home, have a legit birthday, hopefully get a better job (crossing my fingers for Barnes & Noble), and hopefully go visit Dave in Kiawah ... which would be SWEET. Mostly I just want to be HOME again!! Ahh....
But yeah. I have to go proofread some more stories and read some more books and write some more papers ... good times ... except I'll probably turn on the Lizzie McGuire movie because I am lame and still miss Rome to death, haha. Wish me luck.
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