never realized just how messed up i really was until i was finally okay again. finally me again. i don't see the last two years as time wasted because i looking back, i've learned so much from that, and it did make me happy for a little while. but now, knowing just how happy i can really be, knowing just how whole i can really be ... i wonder what exactly i thought was going to happen that whole time. when i was in london it was like the real world knocked on my door and said, "hey, there's a whole universe out there that's so much more than you think you know." nobody is perfect. everyone makes mistakes. and i think that it's definitely a scary possibility that everyone has someone out there for them, but that you could go your whole life and never find them-- both on opposite sides of existence, searching for their other half to no avail. i don't think everyone is just lucky. but i do believe firmly in this fact: people are flawed and all of us will make inevitable wrong turns at certain points in our lives, but after all of it is said and done, if you try and do the right thing and try to go the right way (back up those roads you went down, turn after turn until you find the right street)-- you will find what has been waiting for you all your life.
and the best part is, our lives haven't even really started yet.
not everyone is just lucky. but i do also believe firmly in this: we're the lucky ones.
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